Assertiveness

3. Giving Feedback

For a manager, giving and receiving feedback are key aspects of assertive behaviour. You can expect feedback sessions with people who have had assertiveness training to be particularly frank and issues-based.

3.1 Discuss poor performance in a constructive spirit, in private.

• When giving feedback, know what positive outcome you want to achieve.
• Make suggestions about alternatives, but let the other person identify what action to take. Avoid telling them what to do.
• Be clear about your motive. If it is simply to vent your own feelings, do not do it.

3.2 When discussing a problem, talk about the facts of the case.

• Both parties should avoid personal comments. Sentences beginning 'You are...' are seldom helpful.
• Your aim should be to correct the fault, not criticise the person. Be direct and specific and avoid exaggeration. Do say 'There were faults in the accounts sheets in columns two, three and ten.' Do not say 'The accounts were full of faults.'
• Give credit for the person's achievements.

3.3 Share your interpretation of the facts.

The circumstances surrounding poor performance may have been misunderstood.

• Encourage the employee to respond to your description of the facts. Make it clear that you are listening.
• Ask 'How do you see this?' or 'Is that a fair description?' to get the employee's version of events.
• Keep asking until you get a response. If at first you get no reaction, be patient. Do not accept silence as meaning the other person has nothing to say.
• Respect the other person's feelings and be sensitive to the response to your feedback.

3.4 Listen calmly to the other person and show you understand what is being said.

• Give the person time to formulate an answer. Be patient. Do not rush people.
• Help shy people by asking questions they can answer easily and guide them towards stating their views.
• If you don't understand an answer, ask more questions to clarify. Do not jump to conclusions or make assumptions.

3.5 Offer and accept apologies, ungrudgingly, if they are appropriate.

• Poor performance will not improve if there is ill-will between manager and employee. Positive expectations on one side and determination to do better on the other are needed.

3.6 Summarise what has been said and agreed. Clarify that there are no further obstacles to good performance.